Trogdor- the Green Serpent
The Trogdor is a beast first reported in the seventeenth century In the Japanese highlands. The name means Moist Leaf, Referring to the green color of its scaly hide. The Trogdor is a class 3 Dragonoid. It has the characteristic of having a constantly changing physical form, meaning that as the creature ages its physical form changes, its humanlike features disappear and it becomes more reptilian.“It typically happens suddenly, the heat, and buffeting of air can be felt miles away from the site of an attack from the beast, though nobody has ever gotten a clearly lit image of it, we all know its name, and the signature of its presence. The name of this curse is still TROGDOR.”
http://www.valleynewslive.com/story/16301983/Hellokittytruckfire
this is all it said in the Email that as sent to me from the director of the Monster Hunters International Association of Truth. I had recently been promoted in this online organization for my successful proving of the existence of the Chupacabra in my search of south Texas, mostly in the San Antonio area. Intrigued, I decided that it would be a good idea to find out what this was all about. I booted up laptop in my Custom 1993 Extended wheelbase Express 2500 Cargo van and set to work researching the Trogdor.
Obviously the general masses are not going to believe that such a miraculous creature could exist, however the legend of the beast is widely known in the monster hunting communities. From a quick search I found that a Zoologist, Reginald Veljohnson had recently published a paper on interspecies trancendention and had specifically cited the legend of the Trogdor in his paper saying that it would be genetically possible for a komodo dragon to grow in such a manner if exposed to the correct stimuli, namely Irradiation, and the introduction of new genetic material into it’s embryonic cells.
The link that came from the email led to a news story about a truck carrying the popular Japanese franchise’s merchandise had been burned to smoldering heap of warped metal, and in the trailer there was evidence of human remains. There was more evidence as well that the Trogdor was a player in this in that the container that the truck had been hauling had been loaded in Fukishima Japan
It looked as though my life was about to move north.
The firestorm was still raging out of control. The fire departments from almost every county in the state have been called in to control it. The Gridlock on the roads leading out of the zone was severe, however the road in, though broken in some places was sparsely populated, and only by National Guard vehicles, and other emergency management agencies.
I knew that something had gone horribly wrong in the twenty two hour drive from San Antonio. However I was best equipped to handle the situation because I knew what the cause of the disaster was while the authorities had only been able to guess the cause was a terrorist attack.
Not wanting to be stopped I used a tactic I had often used in Texas and installed my stolen Government plates and my Door magnets claiming that I was a part of the Bomb squad in the san Antonio police department.
As I was doing this, a tremendous buffeting occurred. The overpass on the highway had fallen and I was going to have to find a way to get around it. I didn’t have to be concerned for long though because immediately I knew the cause of this. A surge of air pushed away the dust rising from the rubble, and I saw the creature that I knew would be my next victory.
The creature was indeed impressive with its single beefy arm and its s shaped serpentine body and its v shaped oversnout crest. It would look great as a hood ornament on my Express.
At that moment my phone rang. It was another bank call. They were looking for me because of the huge loan I had taken on my house that I inherited in order to find the Chupacabra. I knew that it was a lost cause to try and repay them and that I was going to loose the house, however at this particular moment that had been one of the best decisions of my life, because when the phone started ringing the Trogdor froze in place, standing so still that he looked part of the landscape.
I had decided that before I left I would find the weakness of the beast, and I could see it in the way it reacted to my Ringtone. It was subdued by the alluring rhythmic powers of Rock and Roll.
Immediately I thought of plan 38 A in the episode of my favorite TV show, Torchwood. In it the creature from the rift was mesmerized by the sound of Susan Boyle. The same could be applied here.
I immediately left the area, with the creature letting me go. Unfortunately, my camera lenses had been covered with dust from the bridge collapse so I couldn't get a clear shot.
I called my cousin Squeedly and he came down right away. I had a plan.
Squeedly pulled up with his trailer laden with the fertilizer that we would need to pull off this plan. Mixed with gas it would create a violent enough reaction to slay any incarnation of the Trogdor.
Meedly, Squeedly's brother started playing his bass in the back of my van and the creature followed. The truck was hidden in a hanger at the airport. From this we were able to lure the creature to the bay, and stage an impromptu concert. The calmed look in the magnificent specimen's eyes told me that it was working, and Squeedly started to perform his own music. Then medley began with his to counter. The beast enraged by Meedly's effort to upstage the more skilled musician immediately set fire to Meedly, causing me and Squeedly to bolt. In our run to the van we heard the sound of a success. All ten tons of phosphorus went up shredding the hanger to bits. I then decided that I would need help so I called in the fire department to put out the flames. As the fire was put out I couldn't help but notice an absence of the smell of burnt flesh associated with something biological being on fire. This is because there was no fire.
I opened my eyes to find that I was in my room.
And then there was fire. It was not a pleasant sensation knowing that the smoke could suffocate me. I ran to the window in order to get air, but I was unable to open it because the wood had warped from the heat. I knew that this would be my final resting place. I slowly slipped into the inky blackness of unconsciousness.
My name is Carl Winslow and I am a monster hunter.
Trogdor!
Trogdor!
Trogdor was a man
I mean, he was a dragon man
Or maybe he was just a dragon
But he was still Trogdor!
Trogdor!
Trogdor!
Burninating the countryside,
Burninating the peasants
Burninating all the peoples
And their thatched-roof cottages!
Thatched-roof cottages!
Whoa, this has wicked dueling guitar solos
It's like squeedly versus meedley over here
Go squeedly!
Go squeedly!!
Squeedly wins!!!
When all the land is in ruins
And burnination has forsaken the countryside
Only one guy will remain
My money's on
Trogdor!
Trogdor!
And the Trogdor comes in the night .
